52 questions to ask your parents and grandparents

The best questions are small and specific. "Tell me about your life" is too big. "What was your house like when you were little?" gets a story. Here are 52, one for each week of a year, in an order that starts easy and goes deeper.

Ask one at a time, listen without correcting, and let the quiet be quiet. The second story is usually better than the first.

1. Where were you born, and what is the first thing you remember about the place you grew up?
2. Tell me about your mother. What was she like, and what did she teach you without meaning to?
3. Tell me about your father. What do you remember most about him?
4. What was your house like when you were little? Walk me through it.
5. Who was your best friend as a child, and what did you two get up to?
6. What did you do for fun when you were a kid?
7. What was school like for you? Was there a teacher you never forgot?
8. What foods remind you of your childhood? Who made them?
9. What was your first job, and what did it teach you?
10. What was the first thing you ever bought with your own money?
11. Tell me about the first time you fell in love.
12. How did you meet the person you spent your life with, or the people who mattered most to you?
13. What do you remember about your wedding day, or the day you decided to share your life with someone?
14. What was the day you became a parent, or became close to a child, like?
15. What was the best advice anyone ever gave you?
16. What song takes you right back to being young?
17. Tell me about a time you were really scared, and what you did.
18. What is the funniest thing that ever happened to you?
19. Tell me about a trip you will never forget.
20. What was the best home you ever lived in, and why?
21. Who in your life made you feel the most loved?
22. What are you proudest of?
23. Tell me about a time you failed at something. What happened next?
24. What was the hardest year of your life, and how did you get through it?
25. What has changed the most in your lifetime that you never expected?
26. What was a holiday tradition in your family growing up?
27. What did your neighborhood look like when you were a kid?
28. Tell me about a pet you loved.
29. What is something you wish more people knew about the world you grew up in?
30. What was the most daring thing you ever did?
31. What were you like as a teenager? Be honest.
32. Who were the heroes in your life, famous or not?
33. What work did you do, and what did you love or hate about it?
34. What was a day that changed the direction of your life?
35. Tell me about a favorite meal, and the people around the table.
36. What was a time someone was unexpectedly kind to you?
37. What do you know now that you wish you had known at twenty?
38. What is a family story that always gets told, and what really happened?
39. What do you hope people say about you someday?
40. What did your grandparents do, and what do you remember about them?
41. What is a small thing that makes you happy every day?
42. Tell me about a friend who meant a lot to you.
43. What was it like when you became a grandparent or a parent figure to someone?
44. What would you tell your younger self?
45. What is your favorite place in the world, and why?
46. What are you most grateful for?
47. What is a mistake you learned the most from?
48. How has your idea of a good life changed over the years?
49. What do you want each person in your family to know about how you see them?
50. If you could give one piece of advice to your family for the years ahead, what would it be?
51. Is there anything you have never told anyone that you would like to say now?
52. What would you like your family to remember about you?